music monday// You make everything beautiful

So valentine’s day is around the block…again. And you find yourself single…again. Fret not, you’ve got company. Whether you’re single or taken by a godly person, you are loved beyond measure by the Author of love.

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I’m not worried about my future sweetheart. I know God is preparing him for me and our future children to be a loving and diligent husband and daddy to me and our kids. To be honest, my thoughts have been soaked wet more about my purpose and using the gifts God has given me to bring Him glory. I know He has my sweetheart in mind, and this is just a waiting season where I’m supposed to grow and mature properly into the full stature of Christ. I know He’s setting the stage for future hubs and me to meet, cause He told me so! And I believe Him!

So while your girlfriends are going on special dates this valentine, remember that love is not just about guy-girl relationships. Ahh, love is so much more! There’s your family, friends, strangers, lil kiddos to love on. You can go on a fun outing with some of your single friends and enjoy your friendship, and snuggle with a great book later. Don’t wallow in loneliness and mope around. Life is bigger than a significant other. There are aching, homeless, hungry people to reach out to. Be the light of Jesus where you are. Remember to pamper yourself too- manicure and pedicure anybody? Wear that lovely dress just because, and cook your favorite meal. Drink a bit of some sweet wine or your fav drink and be thankful for His breath of life and love within you.

You make everything beautiful~rebecca st. james

Grant me serenity to accept things,

The things I cannot change.

Grant me the courage, Lord

To change what I can,

Wisdom to know the difference.

In my weakness You can shine,

In Your strength I can fly and

You make everything, everything beautiful

You make everything, everything new.

You make everything, everything beautiful

In its time, in Your time, it’s beautiful

Grant me serenity, Lord,

And patience, for things will take time

Grant me freedom to walk a new path

And let me feel Your love.

Lifting open hands to You, my Savior,

Beautify my soul.

Knowing You redeem my pain and failure,

Purify my soul, beautify my soul.

 here's the inspiration behind the song

“but He said to me, ‘My grace is sufficient for you, for My power is made perfect in weakness.’ Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me.” 2 corinthians 12:9

“an unmarried woman or virgin is concerned about the Lord’s affairs; her aim is to be devoted to the Lord in both body and spirit…” 1 corinthians 7:34

“there is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens…a time to weep and a time to laugh, a time to mourn and a time to dance…He has made everything beautiful in its time…” ecclesiastes 3:1,4,11

“but seek first His Kingdom and His righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.” Matthew 6:33

“but those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint.” Isaiah 40:31

“but as for me, I watch in hope for the Lord, I wait for God my Savior; my God will hear me.” micah 7:7

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In His own beautiful time, our gracious and loving Father will bring our Godly men into our lives. I urge you to focus on God and His purpose for your life. I hope you don’t become so desperate for a guy/girl that you lower the Godly standards God has for you. With or sans a guy, you are unbelievably loved! Alone is not lonely, so it’s better to be alone and have your integrity than to cheapen yourself by hookng up with some guy. Patience is a virtue. You have the desire to be in a Godly relationship leading to marriage because God most likely put that desire there in your heart. Allow Him to write your love story. It’ll be beautiful! Wait and see. :)

xoxo, gen delali.

currently

listening to- my lighthouse by rend collective, little light by rachel platten, God is good by dustin kensrue. can i say how much i love rend collective?! so, so good!

enjoying: my book thrifting trips. i found really great books by anne lamott, joshua harris, eric & leslie ludy among others on my last trip. i found 2 copies of i kissed dating goodbye! i'm deciding to gift the second copy. *mentally scrolls through friends.* haaa, i know who! ;)

reading- genesis- really refreshing to get back to the basics of this God-given life. i love being plunged into the stories of flawed people who loved God from the beginning of time, i love the unfolding, the redeeming. i dunno but i giggled each time abraham had to lie that sarah was his sister and not his wife in order for his life to be spared. and the interesting part is, each time, he & sarah were sent off with lots of gifts after the lie was brought to light. funny, little couple that God used greatly!

aaand, i'm almost through with i kissed dating goodbye by joshua harris!! guys, the wealth of Godly wisdom dripping from this book is nothing short of amazing! having being single for over 3 yrs, patiently waiting for God's best, the book goes down my throat really well. it affirms my convictions about serving God & being productive in the waiting season. i'm gonna be blogging some excerpts pretty soon. and the fact that he wrote it when he was only 21?? incredibly wise beyond his years if you ask me!

watching- nothing really, although there are sermon videos, meaningful scripture-based movies, and videos from the anima series that are begging for my attention. haha i'm too caught up soaking in words from books. that's what happens when the bookworm in me fully awakens. ;)

understanding: what it means to seek first the Kingdom of God-[my forever Home] and His righteousness and trusting Him to take care of the details of my life.

rocking- finger coils. i had on twist outs for some time and decided to go for a new look. i did the finger coils myself last weekend, all by the help of some useful kinky hair tutorials i found on youtube. i used organic root stimulator lock & twist gel. it took me close to 5 hrs to finish all the coils. it's been a week and it's still looking pretty neat as compared to the twist outs which began to look a lil messy after a few days. but maybe that's bcos i used only water+hair oil without the gel for the twist out? welp, i think i'll go with the finger coils more often. it's convenient and easy to maintain.

memorizing- philippians 4:6-7 "be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God; and the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding will guide your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus."

romans 12:2 "do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is- His good, pleasing and perfect will."

2 timothy 3:16 "all scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness."

2 corinthians 10:4-5

"for the weapons of our warfare are not carnal but mighty in God for pulling down strongholds, casting down arguments and every high thing that exalts itself against the knowledge of God, bringing every thought into captivity to the obedience of Christ."

thankful for: the hand of the Lord in my life. without Him i'm sooo lost!

praying: bold, BIG, hopeful, strongholds-shattering prayers.

loving: this lovely quote i found on pinterest.

what have you guys been up to lately?!

xoxo, gen delali.

a letter to my future husband

dear future husband, today is one of several days that I’ve gone on my knees to talk to our Father about you. I’ve been thinking a lot about you lately, and I’ve got to admit that I miss you. Crazy huh? We haven’t met and yet I miss you. I miss you not because I hold any memories of you and us yet, but I miss you because of all the memories I’m dying patiently waiting to make with you.

"I charge you, o daughters of Jerusalem, by the gazelles or by the does of the field, do not stir up nor awaken love until it pleases." song of solomon 2:7

In my desperation to meet you, I blindly and foolishly tried to turn the wrong guys into you and tried so hard to see you in guys that were nothing like you, and expecting them to be my savior when Jesus is the only person who can save me. I blame this on my lukewarmness in Christ and hence my lack of proper discernment. And if you’ve been anything like me in this regard, I forgive you, and I believe you will too.

But I’ve grown, still growing in the knowledge of Christ and allowing my mind to be renewed and my heart to be healed by Him. I’m glad to say there’s a distinct distance between the days of me being a “Christian” and me actively pursuing Christ and dying to self. It’s been a few years now, and it’s been hard, but I’m hanging on. I’ve handed over the broken pieces of my heart to our Savior, knowing that He’s the only one who can fix me, and trusting that He’ll hand a good piece of my heart to you because you love Him and in pursuit of Him too. Since I don’t believe in the mythical “soul mate”, you know, this one person on the face of the earth who’ll be the only guy for me, I’m following the pointers in the love letters of Daddy that’ll make me recognize you as my potential hubby among other Godly guys. (you gotta raise your game, babe. ;))

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I’ve embraced this special season of alone time with daddy God, and I’m learning a lot. I’m learning how to respect you and love you unconditionally the way Daddy talks about in 1 corinthians. I’m learning how I’ll submit to you as the head of our home, how I’ll need to trust your leadership and be the best helpmate to you, thanks to ephesians.

I’ve been praying that you grow in Christ too, that you use your time as a single to know more about our Savior and how Daddy needs us to live. I pray that we use this time to passionately serve Daddy and others too, that we both develop our talents (did I mention I’m learning the guitar? *giggles*), that we intentionally share the good news of the salvation of our friend and brother, Jesus, and really be the salt and light of the world. Spending our time wisely this way will allow us to love our temporary single gig, trust me. ;)

I pray that your identity is found in Christ and Him alone, that you will wait patiently to meet me and pursue me like Christ pursues the church, His bride. I want you to choose me, to want me and love me as your partner for the rest of our lives on this side of heaven. I’m done with the games those other guys played, and I want you to be sure of me and choose me. Cos darling, our Daddy says “he that finds a wife finds a good thing”. I’m trusting Daddy to write our love story, I’m counting on Him for the timing, the moment when our paths will finally cross. And it wouldn’t be just sunshine & rainbows & butterflies, but we’ll intentionally choose to love each other.

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I pray that we’ll court in a manner that is pleasing unto Daddy, that we keep our purity and flee from temptation for our own good. I dream of spending time with you in prayer, and chatting about Daddy’s love letters to us. I dream of taking walks with you, having picnics together by a gentle, quiet water, going on hikes, biking and camping together. I dream of going fruit picking, and visiting farmers markets with you. I dream of relishing in the simple, yet lovely moments with you. I dream of serving and being the hands & feet of Daddy with you, sharing the good news where we we’ll be and going the distance to do the same.  (your girl’s quite the dreamer. but of course, with Daddy, our dreams in His will come true. :) )

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 The moment we marry in the presence of Daddy, is when you will then become the one, my soul mate at last. I dream of chatting with you in bed late at night and giggling with you over silly, lovely things. I dream of taking road trips with you, singing our songs with the glasses rolled down and the wind in our hair. I hope that we’ll both have a child-like faith in Daddy God all the time. I hope to go on missions with you when we get the opportunity to. I dream of making sweet, beautiful babies with you when Daddy blesses us with them. I dream of raising them up with you, in the knowledge and wisdom of God, teaching them His true and sure ways. I pray that you’ll never abuse your authority as the leader of our family, but that you’ll love me well and be a great teacher to our kids. I pray that we’ll grow old together and be full of so much love for each other still. I pray that on the bad and hard days, we’ll pray for strength and patience to keep loving on each other.

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Dear future husband, I pray that we’ll choose each waking day to do life together and never cease to drink from the fountain of Jesus Christ, our rock. I pray that our marriage will be a shining picture of the relationship between Jesus and His bride, the church, that our marriage will point people to Christ and be a witness to Love Himself. and I pray that you pray for me as I do for you, that you hope and dream of these things and more for us as I do.

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But until we do meet and live our broken yet beautiful lives, I’ll keep living a meaningful life for the greatness of Daddy’s Kingdom (our eternal home), a life that honors you. I’ll be patient while I wait for you. And on the lonely nights, I’ll talk to Daddy about you and read some more of the love letters in the Bible.

like brooke fraser says, and like I can’t force the sun to rise or hasten summer’s start, neither should I rush my way into your heart. I’ll be waiting for you baby, I’ll be holding back the darkest night. Love is waiting till we’re ready, till it’s right.

your wife in waiting,

xoxo,

genevieve delali.

For the single ladies...and men too!

Today, I would like to share some great insight I picked up from the singles’ summit my church hosted last month. Trust me, it’s that good. Here goes...

So, as a single, before you go about focusing on a potential spouse’s strengths and weaknesses, you need to answer a question: if you found someone exactly like you, would you marry that person? If the person has the same beliefs, habits, likes/dislikes, quirks, passions, flaws as you... would you marry the person?

Thing is, you need to be miss/mr. right. You need to be Godly yourself before asking God for a Godly partner. The journey starts with you. Develop yourself first. Becoming a Godly person is a process, not an event. You develop yourself for life, not just marriage. Truth be told, marriage isn’t everything. Marriage isn’t a destination. It’s not an end in itself. It’s the beginning of another phase in your life.

In developing yourself, there are three important relationships you need to pay attention to:

·         The vertical relationship: this represents your personal relationship with God. You need to develop a strong passion for God. “Teacher, which is the greatest commandment in the law?” And He said to him, “You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, and with all your soul, and with all your mind. This is the great and first commandment. Matthew 22:36 Ask yourself, “What am I ready to sacrifice for God?” Fall in love with God’s Word and obey it. Let the Word of God affect your personal life. (Joshua 1:8, 1 Peter 2:2, Psalm 119:11)

·         The horizontal relationship: this represents your personal relationship with other people. You need to learn how to relate with others, how to love people (yes, including the ‘not-so-lovables.’) “Beloved, let us love one another; for love is of God, and he who loves is born of God and knows God. He who does not love does not know God; for God is love.” 1 John 4: 7-8 Develop a social life (Lord knows I need to. Lol I barely hang out with friends lately), surround yourself with Godly friends and be hospitable. Have good clean fun. (Proverbs 18:24, Ecclesiastes 11:9) Some things you can do socially with friends are; eat out at a restaurant, have a cookout, go watch a good movie, take a tour/trip. You’ve got to relate positively with the opposite sex without having sex with them, kissing/touching them. (1 Timothy 5:1-2) You need to learn how to disagree without being aggressive and learn to be a door, not a door-mat.

·         The internal relationship: this is the relationship you have with yourself. How you see yourself goes a long way to affect how you relate with others. Have a vision for your life because a person without goals needs no helpmate. Develop a healthy self-esteem. See yourself the way God sees you. Do not devalue yourself. “Do you not know that you are God’s temple and that God’s Spirit dwells in you? If anyone destroys God’s temple, God will destroy him. For God’s temple is holy, and that temple you are.” 1 Corinthians 3:16-17 Fall in love with wisdom and knowledge. Have a great appetite for knowledge. Read wide and develop yourself. (Proverbs 3:13-15)                                                                                                                                                            

Are you surrounded with bad marriages? Ok, then I’m sure you’ll relate to the next couple of points. 

Challenges with bad marriages in relation to singles.

1.      Singles get to find out how unhappy some people can be in marriage and this scars them off.

2.      Singles get to see respectable friends turn into horrific wives and husbands due to issues in the marriage and have second thoughts about marrying.

3.      Singles are forced into becoming marriage counsellors by disgruntled married people.

4.      Singles are approached for illicit sexual relationships by unhappy married people.

The effects of such bad marriages on singles are:

·         Skepticism: singles begin to think there’re no genuine happy marriages out there. You start to generalise and say all men/women are liars/cheats.

·         Fear: you begin to think the chances of your marriage working are very low.

·         Pessimism: you start to think marriage is a trap and should be avoided where possible.

·         Mercenary: you see marriage to be all about looking out for yourself instead of looking out for your partner too.

     So you ask yourself, “is there hope?” Well, you’re more likely to hear about a bad marriage than a good one- bad news travels fast!

Remember these:

·         The fact that others failed, if even they were your parents doesn’t necessarily mean your marriage will also fail.
·         Beware of what you make of the bad stories you hear about peoples’ marriages- you may not be hearing the whole story. “He who states his case first seems right, until the other comes and examines him.” Proverbs 18:17
·         Learn from other people’s mistakes and bad experience. (Proverbs 24:30-34)
·         God instituted marriage and He’s the best one to advice on it- not friends or traditions. Seek Godly counsel. (Proverbs 24:3-6)

How should I approach my relationship/marriage you may ask. First, learn some lessons from Abraham in Genesis 24:1-20. See how he didn’t want his son Isaac to be unequally yoked with any of the daughters of the Canaanites? Exactly. “Do not be unequally yoked with unbelievers. For what partnership have righteousness and iniquity? Or what fellowship has light with darkness?” 2 Corinthians 6:14

Love is not blind. Open your eyes and know what you’re looking for in a partner. Know that marriage is not your destination, it’s a stage in life (Colossians 3:17-19). Never sacrifice your relationship with God on the altar of marriage (1 Peter 2:9).

Six pillars of your approach to a relationship leading to marriage.

1.      Conviction- your faith is non-negotiable. You probably really like someone but he/she isn’t a Christ follower. What do you do? It’s simple. Do not compromise, hoping that you’ll be able to change them. It’s a no-no. And do not throw away your Christian faith to be with the person either.

2.      Consultation- seek God’s guidance and pastoral counsel. Never commit your life to a man/woman who isn’t ready to see your pastor for counselling.

3.      Core values of the person- find out the values of the person because the values the person holds makes the real person.

4.      Character- granted, no one is perfect, but some traits are inexcusable. Know that the flaws which you decide are excusable about the person may or may not change. So, are you ready to live with those flaws?

5.      Companions- the association of the person says a lot about him/her. Are his/her friends Godly people or are their behaviour and beliefs questionable? “He who walks with wise men becomes wise, but the companion of fools will suffer harm.” Proverbs 13:20

6.      Charm- the person’s charm may be great and even intriguing, but charm my dear, is temporary. “Charm is deceitful, and beauty is vain, but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.” Proverbs 31:30 I believe this verse doesn’t apply to only women but men too.

Dear single ladies (and men) out there, remember to first be the Godly person a Godly man/woman will be attracted to. And never settle for less than you’re worth. Marriage is no joke. Be patient and pray about that special someone. Oh, and ladies, let the guy find you and pursue you! Not the other way round. :) Ponder over “He who finds a wife finds a good thing, and obtains favour from the Lord.” Proverbs 18:22 and “Therefore a man leaves his father and mother and cleaves to his wife, and they become one flesh.” Genesis 2:24

This post is a lil lengthy, but thanks for sticking through till the end. I hope you’ve gained some crisp, fresh insight. ;)

Keep praying, and be patient. xoxo

Delali.